The Bar-One Manhunt

The Bar-One Manhunt

Is it just me or are the men portrayed in the Bar-One Manhunt the most useless, pussy-whipped, dull, commonplace, lowercase, but good-looking meaty men representing the typical image of what Men's Health would have you believe men are? 

I imagine this is what all women feel when watching the Miss World Pageant. Yes, they are pleasant to look at, but are they good for anything? 

Having choked, laughed and on various occasions almost vomited my way through a couple of these episodes, I can safely proclaim that these aren't real men. They are mere images of the men they used to be before they joined this warped reality show. And I use the term reality with the utmost of care.

Firstly, they are all abs, shoulders and neatly trimmed haircuts. They all probably smell of Dettol. Not a germ on the lot of them. And therein lies the problem. Because the most hilarious part of the entire show is when Ursula have to keep on reminding them that they are ten of the most fit, most intelligent men in South Africa. Did she also mention young? And if they are that intelligent, then surely this will be as much on display as their naked torsos? And yet. 

And yet. 

Anyone who spend that amount of time developing muscles that size, cannot possibly give their brains the same amount of attention. They may be good looking, strong, pumped, skillful in front of a mirror, but intelligent? I think not. 

Don't get me wrong. I am not saying they are stupid. But ten of the most intelligent men in South Africa? Ten of the most average men maybe, for their age, taken into consideration we haven't actually heard of any of them before this. And on the fit side, I'm sure they are. But can they keep up with your average Springbok rugby player, or Bafana soccer player, or Protea cricket player? Already about 50 men more fit than they are. 

So what makes them so special then? 

That's right. The neatly trimmed haircuts. I'll give them that. It's mostly better than rugby players' hair, and most certainly better than brilliant men like Tokyo Sexwale, or Andre P. Brink. 

So to be a Bar-One Man, you have to be good-looking, pumped, with your shirt off, and have a neat haircut. 

Oh yes, and be willing to be ordered around by a short, cross, female presenter with a bad PMS problem - Ursula - possible the most charmless presenter of any show, on any channel. Like an aging pit-bull, her bark is poison, her look relentless, and when she grows teeth, I switch channels. 

Because even more disturbing than this show's portrayal of real men, is their portrayal of real men with their tails between their legs. 

Woof!